Sunday, March 29, 2015

Lost our Lovely Daughter - Kirsty

On 11 March 2015, Chris and I lost our lovely daughter Kirsty to depression. She also left her elder sister Bonnie and Bonnie's two sons, Cameron and Jesse, as well as other relatives, friends and colleagues.

Kirsty had suffered for the last fifteen or so years but kept on keeping on as they say. It is my belief that those with depression who keep going are among the strongest people in this world. Unfortunately Kirsty lost her soul mate recently, her ex-boyfriend of several years who she kept in touch with at least weekly. He also suffered from depression and lost his fight in late January this year. Kirsty went into a spiral and I couldn't hold on to her, slipping through my fingers when I thought she seemed to be OK. Yes, she still loved him.

Kirsty loved to travel and had been to Fiji, Bali, Thailand and Europe twice, the last time being an eight week free form driving trip with her good friend Katrina whose husband David was good enough to allow Katrina to go.

Kirsty came back from Bali and Thailand vowing never to go there again because of the prevalent attitude to their women.

Kirsty was also had an interest in aboriginals and had been lucky enough to be sent by the Commonwealth Bank to Arnhem land for a week to live with a small group on a beach frequented by a large salt water crocodile ( I have seen the video!).

Kirsty worked in Information Technology and was the Insurance Systems Manager for the Commonwealth Bank insurance division, Comminsure. Kirsty was responsible for the IT upkeep of the 64 programs used by Comminsure. She led a team of 30 who had between 200 and 300 IBM supporting staff in India. The week before a local IBM manager had discussed Kirsty going to India to meet many of the people she had 'known' via email, etc.

Kirsty was a daughter to be proud of that is for sure. Kirsty was fearless and played above her level and across the other divisions of the bank as well.

At her funeral service on the Friday before last she had well in excess of 200 mourners including her loving relatives, friends, the Ramblers and two bus loads of colleagues from the Comminsure and Wealth divisions of the bank.

Six of the Ramblers had known her since she was little when the Ramblers met at our place in Helensburgh and other modellers also knew her at that age on Saturday mornings at the hobby shop at Sans Souci.

I miss you badly my little girl.


Both Sides Of The Border said...

Hi Ray,

I'm so saddened by your loss. I have no words other than I'm thinking of you and your family.

May Kirsty rest now. Her fight is over.

Regards Daryl Blake

South Coast Rail said...

Ray and Chris,
I am very saddened to hear of the recent loss of your daughter.
That was a beautiful tribute you have posted about her and one that must have been hard to write.
She had made her way in her job career and that was reflected in the people who had come to pay their respects.
Thanks for sharing your loss with the model rail community,

BURROWA said...

Ray and Chris.
I don't think we have ever met but my thoughts are with you both at this difficult time.
Regards Peter Hearsum

Shelton D'Cruz said...

Very, very sorry to hear about this Ray! My thoughts are with you.


Phil White said...


I am very sorry to hear of your loss. It is a devastating blow and I will be thinking of you and Chris in the weeks ahead.


Cathkin said...

Ray, I am very sad to hear of the loss of your dear daughter,whom you and Chris clearly loved very much.
I have a good idea how you both must be feeling, having both lost someone dear, as well as having a daughter diagnosed with a serious illness, but also being lucky enough to have to successfully come through depression. I only mention all this to show you how much I can empathize with you. Regards, Walter Hinterberger.

BOLIVIA said...

Ray & Chris
I'm not sure what to say.
So sad ,our thoughts are with you.

Unknown said...


So sad to learn of your loss. My deepest sympathies to you and your wife. This is a dreadful disease which touches many families, sometimes with awful consequences. I hope your family and many, many friends (most you've never met) give you strength to cope with this terrible situation.

Kind regards
Pete Coombes

Brad H. said...


A lovely but sad tribute. Keep strong and hang onto all those great memories.

Murray Scholz said...


so sorry to hear of your loss, my thoughts are with you and your family.

Murray Scholz

Colin Hussey said...


My deepest & hearfelt condolences to you & the family. To me there could be nothing worse than losing one of our children, no matter their age.

Yours & Chris strength must have been such a huge help for your daughter through the years.

Keep stong & keep well, knowing you could do no more than you have already done.

Your tribute, to & for your daughter is something to gladden your hearts, friends & family.

Regards & my best thoughts & prayers are with you & Chris


Geoff said...

Ray, I'm so very sad to have read your post. You've reached out to a group of people who for the most part have never met you. Thank you for expressing your loss in such a tangible way. I cannot imagine your pain, I'm so very sorry for Chris and yourself. My prayers are with you and for Kirsty as well,
Geoff Burns.

Peter said...

Hey Ray and Chris
Sorry to hear about the loss of your Daughter may she rest in peace.
God bless you all

Jim said...

Hi Ray and Chris,
So saddened to read your tribute and I know the pain. So long as you and Chris have each other, you will remain strong. I pass on my condolences to you both at this time.
Jim H.

Peter Randall said...

I was very sorry to hear of your loss and my thoughts are with you and your family.

Regards Peter Randall(fellow modeller and father of three in their twenties)

Nick Sheridan said...

Thankyou for sharing her story. All the best, Nick